Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
意外的还不错！叙述方式很有沉浸感，整体叙事超级王朔，大多演员能立住（尤其女二丁萌萌）。就是有点三段式太割裂了。有趣嘿嘿
看到五颜六色的歌舞厅霓虹灯旁，是黯然失色的“百花齐放”，想起前几天还在跟朋友分析韩国2010年的票房冠军，还在调侃《憨豆特工》和《飓风营救》，我在朋友宿舍哭得像个找不到奶奶的孩子。无论是王朔还是徐超，你们也就只敢在灯红酒绿旁边悄悄地写上已经销声匿迹的四个字了。
可惜没把时间慢行性的设定多利用一下，这个点还是挺有意思的。
有故事的人讲故事总是那么有味道 王朔对死亡与爱情这永恒议题中无限的沉沦与思考 片子两段式非常明显 后半段的隐喻和给观众的想象空间放在商业片中也显得有些高端 对于每个关于生命的议题只是抛砖引玉 有太多的感悟是建立在遗憾之上 而幸运的是两人的表演足以贯穿和赋予故事灵魂 这混沌的世界想要追寻最终的答案 也许都藏在终点到来的时刻
没有去影院看这部片子，真的是遗珠之憾。充满文艺片气息的娓娓道来，让你在不知不觉中度过了一次人生。关于爱情、人生、失去、错过、死亡，每个字眼都会让你思考良久。所有演员都表现出特别高的水准，女二李婷婷更是一句台词让人破防，王13多年不见竟然能演出原汁京味，太多惊喜让我评本片为2021年最佳国产影片，没有之一。
如果我会忘记你，那那个人就不是我了，喜欢这个片儿的质感，格局，喃喃自语，埋下的有趣的伏笔和设定那些，比如两个人上了那个运送化学品的列车上，比如奔跑就会摔倒，越着急越无法到达，比如丁教授被马桶冲走一生，我喜欢它对死亡的浪漫阐述，抗拒却不畏惧，它出脱现实，但情感和人物又回归现实，选曲和配乐也合适，很有味道的一个电影，有点儿缥缈和悠远，多多少少被低估了，7/10吧，看进去了，有点儿喜欢，一切可能关于爱情，但更关于死亡，比较爱情和死亡是同时产生的，
我刚看完电影，感觉主创很勇敢啊，电影里包含了很宏大的主题。王传君的表演很高级。王珞丹也演得更有层次了。我需要多看几遍！
本来想随便看部电影就出门去看钓鱼，我1分钟都没有离开过视线，我真的太喜欢了。我喜欢那种从小牵绊的羁绊，我喜欢他们互相写对方并没有看到的信。比查令十字街84号的情书更动人。我喜欢她生了郭萌。我喜欢郭小鲁，展现了男人感情的变化，但是忠诚的一生爱着苏。我喜欢苏那句：他好的时候我不用在。PS 这片子该是高粱怡广告吧
网友的解读关于男主的幻境我是认同的。
死生寂灭，涅槃轮回，我们何苦难为这个世界呢？你只活在……
只有女人的放荡不羁像极了本杰明巴顿奇事，其他不是无聊就是很扯。
完全辜负了王珞丹和王传君的演技！我丹姐太美了，完美驾驭各年龄段，各种人生阶段！！
真的，这故事越到后面越飞，飞得有点离谱了。你如果说它本来就是奇幻，但它飞得太突然了吧，而且不像传记。
电影像王朔的小说一样，从早期的嬉笑怒骂接地气变成了晚期的自娱自乐谁也看不懂
很喜欢飞机转场的镜头。看完这片更加明白一件事，没有心动过就是没有
1.5倍速看完了，无法用言语去评论这部电影，反正就是很莫名其妙就对了。
就是很多地方有点用力过猛了。
去捷克前后画面比例不一样。“父母是挡在我们和生死之间的一道墙。”“他好的时候我不用在。”
死生寂灭，涅槃轮回，我们何苦难为这个世界呢？你只活在……
‘‘所谓的时光不过是一眨眼而已，我们哭着迎来自己，又哭着送走亲人，想要珍惜，却又不断逝去。生命面前，我们每个人都是孤独的无助者。’’中国版的返老还童，还是挺成功的。
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